Straight From the Mouth

R: And we probably have a bit about that.

Some years ago I heard Jimmy Brogan who was, at the time, head writer for Leno. He talked about how they go about selecting material for the show and he said basically it's all on index cards, that all the writers get together and they talk about the events in the news and try to come up with 20 or so good lines for topic and they just keep sifting through and rating them: pass, keeper, keeper, pass, keeper, and then they try and make it work. How similar is this to your approach?

R: Actually it's a more independent study and you have to trust the fact that the other person is going to bring something that will contribute to the show. The one great thing that we have going for us is nobody shows up with a handful of timewasters. You get more done functioning independently. I think we both have pretty strong writing skills and a good instinct for what is going to work on the show after all of our combined experience and if we each prepare a show at night like we are going to do it alone and show up the next day, sometimes there is actually too much stuff to get on the air.

Nice problem to have.

R: The thing is, if one of the guys is banging the dog so to speak and not doing his share then you're gonna get pretty unhappy about it. When the balance gets out of whack, it's not fair.

Have you always been music free?

T: When Rick first got here we played a couple songs an hour, maybe three to four and we just got too much material, we couldn't get it all in with the music so we just dropped songs. They are pretty liberal around here about letting us do what we want to do and we discovered that the more music we dropped the higher the ratings got.

R: We found that the music was the thing that was driving people away.

Give me some of your best on-air moments?

T: We took a 6-foot 5-inch producer during the Marv Albert crisis, dressed

in the bed and had him call room service and proposition this kid like 20 times on the air. And then lock himself out of the room and run the the halls in his lingerie.

R: We had a Melissa Etheridge guitar to give away. You remember Melissa Etheridge and her girlfriend had the spermdonor? We gave it to the person with the highest sperm count. We hired a lab. We actually had guys meet at a hotel and go into the bathroom and leave a sample.

Did either of you volunteer for this bit?

T: Uhh, no.

What are some of your annual favorites?

T: There is an ugly dog contest, we have an ugly truck contest.

R: I don't know if you realize this or not but we are close to PETA's international headquarters. Their building is on the water so we hold the annual Tommy and Rumble fishing tournament right in front of their building.

As you've gotten older, has your content evolved as well?

T: Yes, but without losing the stuff we talked about seven or eight years ago.

Do you shy away from politics?

T: No, not in this town. We are big on politics, If we can get our senator on the phone in one phone call, our governor called the other day to answer an e-mail. We are very much plugged in to that, we care a great deal about that.

Rick, one of my favorite bits ever was when you were in St. Louis with Steve Cocheran. You, in a dead-on Sammy Davis Jr. voice (who was alive at the time) called Robert Goulet who was staying at a local hotel. I don't recall ever hearing a celebrity buy into a voice more than him. In fact, I think you even had him bellow a few words from "Some enchanted evening." And floor. Are you still big into voices?

R: Yeah I'm doing a lot of commercials, doing a lot of voiceovers, I do McDonalds down in Florida. But wait, there's a footnote to the Robert Goulet story. About a year later, some guy in our chain tipped the guy off and he called me back on the air disquising himself as an angry old man. He started swearin' at me and calling me names and then finally revealed to me who he was. He said he was just getting even with me. From that point on, I could call that guy wherever he was and both he and his wife would take my call and chat. We actually became friends.

Here lately, I've been noticing more fines for on-air material. Does that kind of news ever get your attention?

T: We don't have to go in that direction to be funny at all and we choose not to. We realize that this is a business. Each company that hired us, spent a lot of money on us and we're here to make money. We are not going to jeopardize their license and we don't want to jeopardize their pocket book by doing something stupid. If one of us has any doubt in our minds about doing something that would backfire, we don't do it because there is other stuff to be done. We have plenty of material.

Where is the line?

R: It very much depends. You know we work in the home of the world's largest military installation. The language around here can sometimes be a little coarse, this is a big military town. What is acceptable on our radio show might not be acceptable if your in Springfield, IL. We don't know so I guess every town has a line.

T: There's a few rules that we follow here on the show that obviously we'd be shooting ourselves in the feet if we broke these rules. Military bashing would be just totally stupid.

R: Unless someone is getting the shitty end of the stick In that situation we'd come to the little guys defense but overall the to be patriotic would be suicidal, this is an extremely patriotic town. These people, they go to work every day with the expectation of having to one day risk their lives in defense of your ability to stay free.

During your careers, were there shows that inspired you? Were there shows that pointed you in a certain direction or towards a type show you wanted to do?

T: Honestly my biggest beacon has been Rick Rumble. He set a standard for me when he came here that I believe unattainable. I try to be a dick as much as possible but I just can't live up to him.

R: I was always a fan of (Kevin) Matthews. I thought his stuff was very original. I didn't want to copy it because that would defeat the purpose of being original, but it certainly made the point that if you're unique you can really cut through.

You mentioned that your show is a team effort. Who's on it?

R: We've got five or six people there. Nikki Reeves doing the news; Rod Fitzwell does our sports, he's also our webmaster. Chuck the Intern does our production, runs our board; produces the morning show.

T: He's also the Production Director for the station. And then there's Chill, the Traffic guy.

R: If Tommy or I take a day off, it just lets somebody else talk more. You (Tommy or me) could step out of here for two hours and boss wouldn't even know you were gone.

Speaking of time off, during this holiday season, I see more and more top personalities taking off the last two weeks of the year. If you missed an earlier bit, this is a good time to pick it up in one of a dozen or so best- of shows. Do you and Tommy get equal time off?

R: Tommy gets four weeks (after 10 years of employment). I get three. I'm gonna actually come back the week after Christmas, cause I don't want to waste the vacation time.

In looking back at the year, what comes to mind when you hear 2003?

R: The number of men George Michael has encountered in Beverly Hills rest stops.

What about 2004?

T: The number of men Elton John.

What's your wish for the New Year?

R: Male genitalia.

T: (For Rick) Hoping to grow one.

Tommy and Rick would love to hear from you. E-mail them at TommyandRumble@fm99.com