Straight From The Mouth
The Morning Mouth's May Interview with Toucher & Rich
(Reprinted by permission; Copyright © 2009 Talentmasters Inc.)
Rich: Fred, Crash and I met each other while working at 99X in Atlanta
around 2000.In October of 2003 I moved to Texas to work for the syndicated
Kidd Kraddick show, which is where he met Adolfo Gonzalez who was only 18
years old at the time. Fred was then moved to mornings and along with Crash,
they were part of the new morning show at 99X.In May 2006, the four of us
started an afternoon show at WBCN in Boston where it took less than a year to
become number one with Men 18-44. In December of last year, we were moved to
mornings. If Phil Hendrie were on the show, I'd be working with my four
favorite people in radio.
Crash: I started in 1989 doing traffic reports in Atlanta on six
stations including a hip hop station with a character that make Imus seem
sensitive. Since then I've worked on numerous morning shows, had my own show
working every daypart possible, was fired three times by the same company,
excel at bar appearances but cry that nobody does wet t-shirt contests
anymore and couldn't be happier working with two of the best in the business.
It's makes being 42 in radio a lot more fun than introducing Steppenwolf
songs while wiating to interview the whacky joke guy.
You just got moved to mornings after kickin' butt in
afternoons.How does it feel to be wakin' up again at 3am?
Fred: Who gets up at 3am?In all seriousness, why would that be
Crash: 3am? Thanks to Sports Center and Channel 4 news, I don't have to
get up until 4:30; 3am is for suckers.
Rich:I'm a sucker.
What's the farthest you've let Adolfo get with any of them?
Fred: It's not how far we will let him go, it is the quality of the
targets eyesight that is the main issue.
Crash: Adolfo's stuck on 2nd base, apparently he can't read English or
steal signs, he's pathetic.
You're famous not only for some of the stunts you've done, but
getting them on national TV. Is this by design, or does it just turn out that
Crash: That's all Rich, he's the master with balls the size of Jupiter.
Not even Colt Seavers could match Rich's stunts. I'm only famous for getting
fired three times by the same company.
Rich: Getting on TV is pretty easy. Act inconspicuous, make your sign
real big, be louder than everyone else, wait til the camera is rolling to
make a scene, and stay way past everything in your body tells you to run.
Did you ever have Hillary on the show after your stuntage at her
expense during the campaign? Couldn't believe that the media took so long to
figure it was radio stunt.
Fred: Since Hillary lost we decided she wasn't worth having on.We only
book a-listers like Guy Fieri.
Has management ever turned you down on a bit?
Fred: Hell yeah. All the time.
Crash: There was this one time I wanted to get in a boxing ring with the
PD after I was fired the third time but Leslie Fram (then PD of 99X) wouldn't
Rich: Sure. Sometimes even after we've already done it.
how tough a time comedians are having with Obama. When they do a dig, it
often garners a few boos and hisses. For instance, would you add comedy to
the Swine Flu?
Fred: We cannot do anything that would seem even the most obtuse way to
have to do with race.
Crash: I keep all my comedy far from the blue line, just ask Fred, he
never has to use the dump button on me. As for the Swine Flu, those jokes are
all old, better to save the funny for a good AIDS punchline.
Rich: I don't like to make fun of the mentally or physically
handicapped. If you're just dumb, however, you're fair game Adolfo.
Since you've been on in Boston, who's been your biggest guest
Fred: I think it shows the quality of our "gets" but Aaron Ward from the
Boston Bruins has become sort of a 5th member of the show.With the recent
success of the team that has been a lot of fun.
Crash: That's yet to be seen, we've only moved up to B list celebs, but
we're gainging respect.
Rich: Sometime D-list guests are the best guests. Our listeners would
argue that the best guest we've ever had was Rich Cronin, singer of the 90's
boy band LFO. He had stories about Lou Perlman's shirtless all-boy Top Gun
watching parties, having sex with Jennifer Love Hewitt, and sleeping with 400
pound groupies. If you're reading this, interview this man now.
Have any of them swore they'd never coming back?
Fred: I hang up on guests all the time.Jonah Hill seemed like he was
being a jerk so I yelled at him.However, he called in the next day to
apologize which was great.
Crash: The one's Fred hangs up on.
Rich: Just this morning, Fred tried to hang up on a guest and the
hang-up button was stuck -- so I literally watched him hit the phone console
in total frustration for 30 seconds over and over while this guy rambled on
about boring garbage.
Seems like you have tons of things going on with each show.Where
do you generate most of your ideas?
Crash: Usually on bar napkins after a three day bender or when I'm
pissed at my wife.
Rich: In church. You should try it you drug-taking alcoholic bastards.
Let me get into your minds a bit: Morning Radio jumped on American
Idol perhaps more than any show ever.How do take it beyond what everyone else
is doing and make it special?
Fred: We have never talked about the show.I guess that might be a
mistake.I personally have never watched a whole episode.I have relatives that
are always high so the whole Paula Abdul thing has no relevance.
Crash: By ignoring it.
Social networking is taking over the world.How are you
incorporating platforms like Twitter, Facebook, etc. into your show?
Fred: Very, very, important. The station has zero dollars to promote the
show so we have to be aggressive and use everything that's available. I
honestly don't know why you wouldn't take advantage of it. As if radio people
are such big stars that it isn't necessary.
Crash: We reach out to all our listeners one at a time, that's the
beauty of having so few of them, it's easy to Twitter and Facebook each one
to tell them where we are and what we're doing.
Is PPM starting to have an effect on how you do your show?
Fred: Oh we get notes.
Crash: I think we all agree that getting the show broken down weekly,
daily, hourly and soon minute by minute only takes the pressure off.
I want to go back to bits: give us 5 of the most amazing things
you've done since you got to Boston?
Fred: The fake Praise 104 interview with the religous nuts.Every
commercial we played was for a gay establishment.We had Guy Fieri on and
acted like a super corny "rock n' roll" show replete with DLR like guitar
licks.The great thing is he liked it so much he called us after it to tell us
Rich: Bits involving alcohol became somewhat of a show crutch for a while -- but what a beautiful crutch it was!We did a bit called "The F'ing Champ" which was simply a bracket-style tournament amongst the members and staff of the show as to who coul
Crash: Got drunk and talked to a horse.
Got drunk and yelled at a
Got drunk and interviewd Alan Thicke.
Ran for mayor of
What's the worst most humiliating thing you've ever put Adolfo
Fred: He does it to himself.His interviews are wonderfully awful.
His skills with woman are delightfully horrendous.His ability to
behave in any kind of acceptable fashion is a disgrace.He was raised like an
animal and has come out the other end totally unprepared to function as an
adult in society.That said I like him.
Crash: One time we made him take a shower, you should have seen the look
on his face.
Rich: Adolfo is the greatest, most fascinating guy I've ever met. The
most hits the WBCN web page ever received in it's history was the day we
posted pictures from Adolfo's trip home to Dallas where he took pictures of
the inside of the house he grew up in. One of the filthiest things I've ever
seen. Also, If you show up to a bar with Adolfo, you're drinking free all
night. Easily the most recognized member of the show.
Any thoughts on syndicating your show? Has CBS approached you
Fred: Ah no. CBS has not approached us.
Crash: I'm all for it, I'd love to be able to hear the show when I move.
How has success changed you? (Each of you must share one expensive
toy you gave yourself when you re-uped.
Fred: Honestly since we have moved to mornings it is like we are
starting all over.It really doesn't feel like we are doing well. It feels
like we are lucky to have a job.
Crash: Success has never changed me in 20 years working in radio. I've
done nothing but spoil myself with lavish divorces, trips to Disney World and
expensive Tommy Bahama shirts. My one expensive toy since we re-uped was
writing two checks to the IRS to pay off my balance from 2006.
Rich: I can afford a parking space. Yup. Something that's free almost
everywhere else in the country. And I had to rent it because now that we're
doing mornings, I would get mugged walking five blocks to the free parking in
downtown Boston at 3 in the morning. Woopee!
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